The Bachelor: Episode 6 - Deep Intellectual Things Are Like Our Jam Too

February 8, 2016 by Matt



Welcome The Bachelor Quick Hits for Episode 6.

F4R’s Superhero/Villain Breakdown

We couldn’t help but notice during last night’s “dramatic” episode some deep similarities between the remaining contestants and some of Marvel and DC’s greatest characters. We hope that Hollywood pays attention for the next casting call. Something tells me that these women wouldn’t mind extending their fifteen minutes.


Olivia as Harvey “Two Face” Dent. As Amanda, Jennifer, and Emily tried to explain to Ben last week, Olivia is not exactly the same person around Ben as she is around the girls. She does an artful job of deflecting the venom when Ben confronts her at the cocktail party, before daring the other women in the confessional to “Come at me, Brah” and telling them all to “suck it.” Fortunately, Ben saw through her BS and taunted her with a rose before abandoning her on an island in the rain. Olivia could also have been a superhero with cankles and bad breath, but I’m not sure that character exists yet. Just in case Marvel reads this, we are hereby trademarking this character and calling her “The Repeller.”


Caila as The Riddler. Honestly, I have no idea what the hell she was saying to Ben on their one-on-one. One second, she feels like she loves him. The next she says she’s going to hurt him. Then she feels “understood.” Yeah, all that I understood from this interaction was that Caila is an enigma wrapped in a puzzle that I have no desire to solve.


Leah as The Hulk. Here we were wondering why Ben wasn't giving this sweet, shy girl a chance. Then, this week, out of nowhere, Leah gets angry when she is passed over for her first one-on-one so that Caila can go on her second and, it turns out, that you won’t like Leah when she’s angry. First, she glares ruthlessly away from Ben when he sits next to her on the couch to wait for Caila to leave on their date. Then she rightly threatens to leave, so as not to put herself through a two-on-one. But, of course, she stays and sulks and cries her way through the group date, calling Ben an idiot, before having her first conversation with him in weeks. At some point, she transforms into full-blown Hulk and directs her rage against sweet Lauren B. for no reason. I only wish they played the sad Hulk music when she got in the limo.


Jennifer as Susan Storm (a/k/a The Invisible Woman). Enough Said.


Emily as Jean Grey (a/k/a Phoenix). Emily was reborn this week, emerging from the ashes of last week’s debacle to defeat Olivia and sail off into the rain to live another day.


Lauren H. as Spiderman (technically Peter Parker). Ultimately, our lovable girl next door couldn’t escape the friend zone. It looks like she’ll need a radioactive spider bite to get noticed by Ben.


Becca as Professor Charles Xavier. The boring, but all-knowing Becca was able to read Ben’s mind this week and discover that he loves Lauren B. Becca could also have been Robin, considering it’s a safe bet that the Boy Wonder was a virgin for a long time. As a sidenote, Ben must be doing the worst job as Bachelor of all time. His primary responsibility is to keep his true feelings a secret and lull as many women as possible into deluding themselves that they are going to get married. Somehow he failed epically and managed to fool only Olivia. Everyone else seems to know what’s happening.


Amanda as Daredevil. Blind Amanda actually thought that Ben would rescind Olivia’s rose for the comment he made about her being a teen mom and has convinced herself that 27-year-old Ben is open to raising two young daughters.


Jo Jo as Batman. She seems like the coolest of the bunch and the only one who could pose a threat to Lauren B.’s dominance. Still, she’s going to have to use all the tools in her utility belt and the Batmobile to pull this off.


Lauren B. as Superman. She’s a combination of all-American sweetheart and confident, powerful minx (check out the dress she wore at last night’s group date cocktail party). Lauren B. pretends to be weak in front of her friends to throw them off, but it doesn’t work. She has Ben wrapped around her finger to the point where the other women almost gave up last night. Leah, the only person to try and defeat her so far, lost immediately in spectacular fashion. If only one of these women had Lex Luthor’s brains.


Ben's Grade

A. He cleared out Olivia and the two remaining unknowns. While we enjoyed Lauren H.’s personality, he stopped messing around and kept only those with whom he had a romantic connection. This may be the most attractive and likable final six in the show’s history.

Best Fantasy Performances

Leah went home, but not before amassing an impressive 230 point evening. She earned points for receiving a rose, sneaking over to Ben’s suite, being asked to leave mid-episode, and crying three times.

Emily scored the second highest total of the evening for earning two roses, including the two-on-one rose and the final rose of the evening (part I), and crying.

See you next week. As always, let us know what you thought of the episode or if you think your contestants missed out on well-deserved points.